Stumble it!
June 13, 2005
I’m Drowning…..
I haven’t written lately. The rain has gotten in the way.
Lots and lots and lots of rain. Everyday. And just when we thought the rain was over, the remnants of Hurricane Arlene came over, bringing still more rain. Worse, Bill has been scarce, getting ready for trial. It’s been me and the boys and the rain.
Summer can be stressful with three boys around even when the sun is shining. But in good weather, I can command a boy to go run ten laps around the house as punishment. I can send the duo outside to collect 78 roly-polys. That takes at least an hour. I can encourage races to release unbearable energy.
If I’m having a bad mothering moment, I can set a timer for two hours, and tell all three boys to stay outside until the timer goes off.
I really can’t do any of those things when it rains. At least, not where I live. I would if I lived in the country, far from prying eyes, but our street gets just enough traffic that some nosy person would see the boys running laps in the rain and call Child Protective Services, or my mom.
So I have spent the last two weeks cooped up inside with three boys following me around, asking questions, and stirring up trouble. We have read books, colored, journaled, made Lego creations, cooked, seen “Madagascar,” napped, and driven each other berserk.
Even Porter, ever faithful, started to lose a little faith, as he prayed for sunshine every night and was greeted by a fresh deluge each morning. He was solid enough, however, not to be fooled when the Weather Channel warned of the possibility of flash floods accompanying Arlene.
“That man is wrong,” Porter declared. “God promised he would never ever flood the earth again,” he said with a certainty that no one else in the Tiny Kingdom was feeling.
Arlene swept through last weekend with wind and more rain, and it rained so hard that people just stayed home. At that point, I decided that it was safe to command the boys to go run around the house and stay outside until I called them to come in. I figured if I was lucky they’d get wet enough that I would not have to bathe them that night.
Meanwhile, I cleaned closets. After an hour or so, I came out of my room and was surprised to see Finn standing outside the front door of the house, in the middle of the lawn, completely naked, with a stopwatch in his hand.
The twins were standing on the front porch, out of the rain, clothed, laughing hysterically.
Upon investigation, I discovered that Porter had bet Finn $6 that he would not stand in the rain naked for five minutes. Finn won that bet.
Later Porter won back a portion of his money by parading around the house with a pair of my panties on his head.
Drew kept both his money and his dignity.
I’d post the pictures of the bare-assed shenanigans, but I’m afraid that we’d receive an unwelcome invitation to Neverland Ranch as a result.
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June 13th, 2005 at 7:14 pm, lisa Says:
Classic! See? You’re doing something right. Very creative young men.
June 13th, 2005 at 7:23 pm, Perri Says:
Woo Hoo. So glad to see a post from The Tiny Kingdom. My day was made better. How old is Finn? Not that it matters - well, maybe if he is 18 or so. But that is hysterical - and something that my boys would pull. Here is a great way to get some laughs and a funny memory to boot. I suggest having a camera ready. If I had - I would be 10,000 bucks richer.
http://lottakids1961.blogspot.com/2005/03/greatest-grossest-experiment-ever.html
June 15th, 2005 at 6:12 pm, MistressMary Says:
That is hysterical. By the way, I tagged you for a meme. You don’t have to do it. No pressure.