June 27, 2007

The Simple Squalid Water Pumper

The extreme drought conditions are making things tough on everyone. The grass is brown and crispy. Carwashes are closed. Our city has received 16 inches less than normal rainfall for the year if I’m reading the local weather station correctly.

Don’t take my word for it:

French blue hydrangeas my mother gave me dying of dehydration

Patch of fried grass by mailbox

Under the mandatory watering (or non-watering) guidelines in place now, odd-numbered addresses can handwater lawns and gardens before 10 am and after 10 pm on Tuesdays and Fridays. I’ve gotten Porter to water in the morning a couple of times, but none of us has been enthused about going outside in the dark to hose down perennials.

We’ve been saving water from baths and showers and taking it outside in buckets, but that has quickly grown tiresome.

Thus, this weekend I encouraged Porter’s resourcefulness (Dear Lord, I truly will die if he becomes a mama’s boy as he has threatened) and we came up with a fantastic invention to recycle water for the plants I want to save.

THE SIMPLE SQUALID WATER PUMPER

Here are the items you will need for your Simple Squalid Water Pumper:

1. Small submersible pump with garden hose attachment
2. Surge protector or extension cord
3. Garden hose
4. Walkie-talkies
5. Hammer and nails
6. Stakes
7. Foam board, sharpies and stakes
Also, tub of post-shower water:

(obviously my shower due to clarity of water)
INSTRUCTIONS
A. Screw the hose onto the pump and place the pump into the bathtub.

B. If a child is involved, get a surge protector and turn it into the off position. Plug the pump into the surge protector and the protector plug into the wall. At this point the pump will not start pumping until the switch on the surge protector is turned on.

C. Snake the hose from the tub

out the door and to the area to be watered.

D. Use the walkie-talkie to tell the pumper to hit the switch.

E. We have water!

F. We had enough to water four of the five hydrangeas I care about. That was the most water they’d seen in weeks.

The man at the hardware store thinks we can hook the pump to the drain on the washing machine, but that project is for another day. I’m excited about it though, because we use Tide with Febreze and pumping that water is bound to be a beautifully scented experience.

G. Once you’ve established that your system works, you must make a sign to alert passersby that when you are watering outside approved times you are using recycled water and should not be turned in to the water police. This is the most crucial part of the project. People in suburbia are pissed off when they cannot water their lawns. Zoysia fanatics wake in the middle of the night to lovingly douse their sod, while jealous neighbors lurk in bushes trying to catch them. It’s no laughing matter. Fines and jail time are possible for those violating the watering rules.

Do people actually risk surcharges, fines, jail and humiliation by watering on unapproved days?

I’m not accusing anyone, but let me show you the difference in some lawns in MY neighborhood:

A. Poor Horticulturists or Avid Water Conservationists?

B. Lucky Lawn Owners or Blatant Cheaters?

Cast your votes and share your water-saving tips!

Stumble it!

RSS feed for comments on this post.
TrackBack URI

21 Responses to “The Simple Squalid Water Pumper”

June 27th, 2007 at 12:27 pm, lake lurker Says:

Just lurked to see how things are looking on the other side of the pond.England’s having floods in the Midlands. It’s rained EVERYDAY on the golf courses in Ireland. Wish I could send it back home.
June 27th, 2007 at 12:27 pm, alala Says:

Well, we have a condensing dryer that somehow sucks the water out of the clothes and into a tank that then must be emptied. I re-use the water for handwashing bras and sweaters. I understand, though, that that might be a bit too much, just to get through a drought - we bought it because we needed a new dryer anyway and didn’t want to have to cut a hole in the basement wall.

Also, all the gutters on the back of the house feed into a single pipe, and we have a big plastic barrel under it. Of course, that only works if it rains occasionally…

I think Porter’s pump is fantastic.
June 27th, 2007 at 12:40 pm, Peeved Michelle Says:

We haven’t had rain in Southern California in ages and we can still water our lawns. I wonder what your water source is. Even though the L.A. mayor (a tool) recently said something about taking fewer showers to conserve water this summer, most of our water comes from snowpack in the mountains and the snow level was higher than normal, so we are fine. My particular city does have restrictions on watering times, but we can water every day.
June 27th, 2007 at 12:58 pm, Grammie Says:

As a fellow Birmingham resident, I share your pain! I, too, have become a water “deputy” of sorts as I take my morning walk through the streets of Mt. Brook and see various shades of green all around. I get a little miffed in that I am carrying containers of used water out to my yard when I can…and my lawn is getting pretty crispy…

We did get a little respite yesterday afternoon…you could almost hear the grass sighing and the trees singing with delight after Mother Nature spit out a little rain on our parched neighborhood!

Great pump idea….Love your blog!
June 27th, 2007 at 2:05 pm, Runmt31 Says:

We use the water from our dehumidifier, but my opinion is if you’re water bill doesn’t go up, you should be able to water everyday!
June 27th, 2007 at 3:40 pm, Susu Says:

Per Mr. Vance - place a 55 gallon container to catch the runoff from the a/c condensation pump - mine is now underneath my deck, so it’s hidden. As long as you’re running your air, the container will collect the water, which you can scoop out or pour.

Also, instead of emptying your cooler full of ice/melted ice after a day at the pool/ballfield, etc., just empty into flower pots, even the ice.

Also, instead of emptying down the kitchen sink everyone’s glass of ice, place ice directly into flower pots or let melt. I’ve even poured watered-down apple juice, tea, Diet Dr. Pepper or whatever normally goes down the sink straight into the flower beds.

I did place four large Rubbermaid containers on my deck one day just before it rained, trying to collect all of the water I could, but when I went back to empty them, they had all evaporated!! I have to be quicker the next time.
June 27th, 2007 at 4:00 pm, Charro Says:

opinions????….. How morally wrong is it to turn on a few sprinkler stations while I am out of town for 2 weeks??? Two people will not be using bath water, dishwasher water, washing machine, brush teeth water etc for two weeks. Doesn’t that count for something? AND I will not be here to water by hand on my two days in the middle of the night. Yesterday, I was downtown and it really rained hard there but when I got home , I had none.
June 27th, 2007 at 4:53 pm, Cassie Says:

We have been in and out of water restrictions for a month now. We are starting to see some afternoon rain/thunderstorms. I’m sorry, but that is the best invention yet. Way to go!
June 27th, 2007 at 8:58 pm, Mary Frances Says:

That is absolutely ingenious! I bet the other boys will be jealous that they missed out on this.

The pictures of the green lawns made me think that we may need a sign too. We are on septic tank instead of sewer and the field lines run under our front yard. Our lawn (in Hoover)is nice and green despite the drought!
June 28th, 2007 at 3:56 am, jenny uk Says:

I read somewhere that you can siphon really easily as long as you can submerg the whole piece of hose you are using so it is full of water, should be easy in a bath and then put your thumb over one end, make sure the other end stays in the water and when the thumb end is lower than the bath it will just flow through! It does work I tried it on a small scale with my fish tank!
June 28th, 2007 at 6:24 am, Stephanie Honeycutt Says:

Love the ideas! Especially the sign. We have greener plants than many on our street. But we don’t water illegally. We have a pool that when the filter needs backwashing, that dirty water needs to go somewhere. a 55 gal barrel collects the water. Would love to collect water from the downspouts too - but it has to rain before we could do this.
June 28th, 2007 at 9:09 am, Sandra Says:

We have similar water restirctions here in Ontario, not QUITE as strict, but still - conservation minded. I water my gardens and potted plants only during our alloted time. The lawn suffers, but hey, it’s only grass and it looks the same as almost everyone else’s. My husband is a night owl and can hear certain neighbours with the sprinklers running late at night. Do they think no one notices the lush green lawns among the brittle brown ones? And it’s always the people without kids that want the green lawns.
June 28th, 2007 at 9:41 am, Reevesfarm Says:

Cool idea!

I don’t know if you participate in all of this blog award stuff, but I nominated you for one, and the info is on my site when you get a sec.

Also - I am planning to take one for the team, I am washing my car today and cooking out tonight - a sure fire way to get rain.
June 28th, 2007 at 11:15 am, Bamagirl Says:

Anne,

I have come to just luv your blogs. You are so on the money. I live fairly close to the tiny kingdom, more north though and I feel your pain. I now have to pitchers in my shower to catch the water before it warms up. My kids think it is funny, but I’ve got tomato plants that need a drink. I love your sign…Way to go. I did ride thru the tk yesterday and noticed significant difference in the lawns. I guess the ones violating can afford to pay the surcharges. Keep up the good work….
I was a Publix yesterday also, you must have been busy…LOL
June 28th, 2007 at 11:20 am, Chandra Says:

That is awesome! I live in Hoover and am blessed with Bermuda and very little landscaping that has survived the drought so far. This week we have been lucky enough to receive 2 of the scattered showers featured on the local news. Last night I heard my 6 year old daughter praying “Lord, thank you for the rain, but you can stop now, we have had enough!” Two days of missing some play time outside and she thinks we should have enough to have recovered from the drought. If only…
June 28th, 2007 at 8:50 pm, Tammy Says:

The sign rocks.

Although I now feel like a total water waster. I never really thought about some of the methods - like the a/c runoff.

We’ve had just enough rain here to lift the fireworks ban - but I still expect some idiot(s) to catch our entire town on fire.

Love your blog!
June 29th, 2007 at 9:17 am, Lauren Says:

Great idea with the pump. We may try that at our house. I’m going to start putting ice in our window boxes too. Surely the one spying neighbor on our street won’t see us do that!
June 29th, 2007 at 6:06 pm, K Says:

there was a special the other night on the Fox 6 news about a lady in Morris, I think, who has one of those pumps rigged up to her washer
June 29th, 2007 at 10:29 pm, Kassie Says:

That is all brilliant on so many levels!
July 2nd, 2007 at 11:34 am, momumo Says:

I don’t know diddly about the south - but my husband is a turf care guru - and I noticed a couple of things - wtf with the hand watering - sprinkler systems SAVE water, they are much more effective. Also, your pictures, though I can’t be sure appear to be different varieties of grass, and having had drought here in Colorado - I have heard a lot about drought hardy grasses - certain varieties of grass have much deeper roots, and if you keep the blade LONG enough the roots will dive down and the long leaves will cool the grass itself and it will tolerate drought better. Never ever cut your grass shorter than two inches, it causes it to need significantly more water (unless it is a bent grass like Bermuda - which won’t grow happily here so I know nothing about it). Now as for the pump, very very cool, I think he should submit it for science fair next year in school.

last comment to the lady from Southern Cali - that’s our water - at least that’s how we see it here, we are restricted from using our own mountain run-off because it legally belongs to Cali which I think is pure bullshit and pisses me off no end - and the idea that when we are in drought conditions we get charged fines for using too much water, have watering restrictions for our yards and pools, and worst of all farmers have to let fields lay fallow - and when you are in drought you have no restrictions just raises my ire more! I hope to never have to be reminded again that water that begins in my backyard can be used without restriction in California - even during drought - ugh
July 9th, 2007 at 2:05 pm, 2007 Drought: A way to save your plants Says:

[...] Despite the recent increase in area rainfall (and the discussion about how it might have come to be), there is still a great deal of time before we see an end to Birmingham’s extreme drought. Some of our residents are becoming increasingly creative with how they plan to save their outdoor plants. One example can be found over at My Tiny Kingdom as Anne explores how she can save her plants while still being mindful of the conditions around her. _________________________ [...]