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April 9, 2008
Fabulous Feathers In Her Boudoir
So many of you have been pestering me about the oddest topic. How does Feathers stay so fresh and shiny? you ask. Her coloring is breathtaking, but it’s clear that there is personal grooming at work, too.
Frankly, it’s been a mystery to me, too, as anything that enters Porter’s room inevitably leaves the worse for wear. Feathers has been the sole exception.
Last night Porter came in my room and told me he’d been reading his book about parakeets. It advised that birds should be bathed every so often. I protested that it was much too soon; we’ve only had Feathers for six months or so, and it couldn’t be time for a bath already.
But it was time for a bath, and it would be her second bath, Porter said. He was an expert at cleaning parakeets, and he would demonstrate. This was a hideous idea, and I was about to tell Porter as much, but I was diverted by my husband, who had ordered a boatload of turkey calls and was practicing with them in the den. If lady turkeys are turned on by the sound of scrapes on a chalkboard, we’re going to be swimming in turkey meat soon.
After I’d stopped the gobbling I found Porter busily preparing his bird bath.
First he let Feathers admire herself in the mirror while he told her she’d be even more beautiful in a few minutes. “It will all be worth it,” he told her. I wondered.
He explained that the towel was necessary so Feathers wouldn’t slide around in the sink. That seemed kind.
Feathers was lowered into the sink and the bathing began. I had to use all my powers of persuasion to convince Porter that shampoo wasn’t necessary. Birds don’t have access to Pert in nature, do they? He thought maybe we should pour a pool of shampoo outside and see if birds used it, but I told him we’d take it one bird at a time and Feathers was the focus of the moment.
Feathers used her beak to tell Porter she did not like the bath.
Porter cupped her gingerly and stuck her back in the sink, telling Feathers that her bath wasn’t over until her beak was clean. I cringed.
Thankfully, the bath was soon over. No blood was shed and no birds drowned.
Feathers looked defeated, a mere shadow of her former glorious self.
But when Porter took her into my room and tried to blow her dry, she got downright pissed. Porter and I agreed that while the blow dryer might give her feathers added body, she had the right to refuse the service and opt to dry naturally.
I was just thankful that Feather’s salon treatment had taken place in the sink. You may recall that Texas Ranger’s bath took place in a more sordid environment, and lacked the TLC and finishing touches that Feathers received. (Or any finish at all.)
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One year ago in My Tiny Kingdom: It’s Official: Eye’m Old
BTW - the Lasik has been a great success!
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April 9th, 2008 at 9:25 am, Ladybird Says:
Check out that monogrammed hand towel! You are one Southern chic! LOL!
Ladybird’s last blog post..Totally Kissable
April 9th, 2008 at 9:34 am, Chandra Says:
That pissed off bird is too funny! Glad she survived!
We’re looking into Lasik in the B’ham area. May I ask who you used?
Chandra’s last blog post..Works For Me Wednesday- Financial Planning
April 9th, 2008 at 10:41 am, Shell Says:
My Mom tried to blow dry our cat once. Much blood was shed. Glad Porter fared better.
Shell’s last blog post..Flotsam and Jetsam
April 9th, 2008 at 10:47 am, Cassie Says:
LOL! A bird bath, literally. I can see her getting pissed. We’re looking into lasik next year.
April 9th, 2008 at 11:53 am, Jamie Says:
Love the bird bath! Gosh I had a parakeet for YEARS as a kid and I don’t remember giving him a bath. Yikes.
I’m going for a consult for Lasik on the 24th. Just blogged about it, but basically I “won” a free consult and reduced fee. Wahoo! Wish me and my eyeballs luck.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:19 pm, MammaLoves Says:
Never before have I admired a bird, but Feathers?? I may just have to look into this whole bird-owning thing. She’s a beaut.
MammaLoves’s last blog post..Do You Know About This?
April 9th, 2008 at 12:49 pm, Jenny Says:
I love that last picture! How cute is that?! Your boys always make me smile.
Jenny’s last blog post..Recipe Slump
April 9th, 2008 at 3:36 pm, CourtneyRyan369 Says:
Feathers looks just lovely! I’m glad the first bath is out of the way. Did he say how often Feathers should get a bath?
CourtneyRyan369’s last blog post..I’m in Love with a Girl
April 9th, 2008 at 5:38 pm, Toni-EvinNRobsMom Says:
OMG…she’s pissed!! That picture is priceless though. Will this stop Porter from future bathing experiences?? For the bird, I mean. :o)
April 9th, 2008 at 6:08 pm, Shayna Says:
AHAHAHAHA! That last picture of Feathers is PRICELESS! At least she’s clean
April 9th, 2008 at 7:55 pm, jean Says:
That last picture was just pathetic. I cringed at the mere thought of the bird getting the full salon service!
April 10th, 2008 at 4:35 pm, Loth Says:
That last picture? That’s pretty much how I look first thing in the morning! Thank Porter for the tutorial on bird bathing (I am so glad we don’t have any birds!)
April 10th, 2008 at 7:24 pm, Susu Says:
Where did those turquoise-y looking colored feathers underneath that bird come from? I saw an OPI shade at Sally’s that was very similar. Did perhaps Feathers get into your polish???
April 11th, 2008 at 1:42 am, baseballmom Says:
How FUNNY! At least she wasn’t in the toilet for her bath. She looks exactly like our bird, Snowy, and Snowy got a bath a couple of days ago too! You can tell Porter that we’ve had her for about 2 years and she’s never had a bath (except with the spray bottle) until this week. She does try to bathe in her water dish sometimes, though. She looks clean all the time, too…how do they do it? Also, Porter? Snowy liked it when we let the water run a little so she could take a shower–try it! Anne, I totally thought of you today when we were driving the carpool home and they all saw a pair of underwear on the side of the road. Much hilarity ensued, and all I could think about was when your car full of kids saw the thong!
baseballmom’s last blog post..Book mememememeeeeee
April 11th, 2008 at 7:32 pm, Becoming Me Says:
We tried to blow dry our dog after a bath and she had a seizure. Fortunately she survived and has been towel dried since. I am not a bird person ever since being attacked by a parrot (I kid you not) but I enjoyed seeing pictures of yours. It’s great how your Porter cares for his pet. Impressive.
Becoming Me’s last blog post..A snake by any other name
April 13th, 2008 at 5:26 pm, Teri Says:
I’ve been lurking for awhile. This post brought back memories of when I was a kid. I had a bird, one that I did not want but that was the pet my Mom deemed “acceptable”. She gave it a bath one time too often. Poor Butchie started shaking, making this strange sound, did a dramatic death scene & died. Mom was in tears & I just kept telling her she killed my bird.