Stumble it!
August 28, 2008
Too Shocked For Words
When I was diagnosed with hepatitis C, my friend A was the first one at my house. She walked in the door and threw her arms around me.
When I started treatment for the disease, she heard how nauseated it made me. One day she drove over with a bag full of Chik-Fil-A and said, “Mel was right– you look like hell. Get in the bed, and I am going to feed and bathe your boys.” I did, and she did.
As if that weren’t enough, when I was interviewing doctors to decide to which one would get the honor of slicing me open and rearranging my spine, she came with me to New York to help record the massive amounts of information the surgeons were giving us. She was so nervous about performing her job correctly that she hid a pocket-sized dictaphone in her coat while we talked with Dr. Farcy, the surgeon who eventually performed my surgery. He has a thick French accent, and she wanted to be able to capture absolutely everything he had said so that I’d be able to make an informed decision.
When my mom died, she lent me her funeral outfit so I wouldn’t have to wear something of my own and then stare at it in my closet every day.
She’s been a marvelous friend to me.
So when I heard that her husband had collapsed in another state and that she was on her way out there, I got on a plane and followed her. I did the best I could to support her, but when someone dies, especially so suddenly, someone whose jubilant presence is impossible to ignore in life, there’s only so much that humans can do.
A and her husband were blessed with a happy marriage. He was smitten the first time he saw her, and his adoration of her was evident. He was all about family. He and his son spent hours hunting and playing and watching sports. Theirs was a strong father-son bond with a deep friendship as well. And his daughter! Drew spent his entire birthday party one year following her around with a love-drunk expression on his face, and she had that effect on her dad as well. She’s opinionated, funky and spunky, and though it sounds cliched, she had her daddy wrapped around her finger. Or even the tiniest bit of fingernail.
Please raise up my friend and her children in your prayers.
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August 28th, 2008 at 8:37 am, Sandra Says:
Oh man, I’m so sorry for A. The cliche “only the good die young” seems so true in this situation. I’m thinking of the family, and wishing they get through this. WIth friends like you, I’m sure they will, somehow.
Sandra’s last blog post..done!
August 28th, 2008 at 9:56 am, Liz Says:
I am keeping your friend and her family in my thoughts.
Liz’s last blog post..Loving my new employer already
August 28th, 2008 at 10:01 am, Katrina Says:
I’m so sorry to hear about your friend’s husband. A friend like that is a true treasure, and I know that she will be needing you and your strength in the days to come. I will keep all of you in my prayers!
Katrina’s last blog post..Look Over There!
August 28th, 2008 at 10:31 am, Headless Mom Says:
Hugs, kisses, and many prayers for A and her family.
And for you too. I’m guessing that you will not be having an easy time either. I’m so sorry.
Headless Mom’s last blog post..Works For Me Wednesday-School’s IN!
August 28th, 2008 at 10:34 am, Jen Says:
Anne,
I am so sorry to hear about A’s husband. I am confident that your friendship & supprt will help pull her and her kids through this horrible time. Hold them close.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:46 am, Loth Says:
How sad. So very sorry to hear this and will keep your friend and her family in my thoughts.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:11 am, twinkie Says:
I will keep them in my prayers.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:43 am, Holly Says:
I’m so sorry to hear about A’s husband. I’ll keep her and her family in my thoughts. Thank goodness she has you.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:50 am, Laura Says:
I am so sorry for her and her family’s loss. I will be praying for her and her family.
August 28th, 2008 at 11:53 am, Katherine Says:
I’ll keep them in my prayers - along with another friend whose death I just learned of today - he also died too young.
I’m sure your friend will appreciate your presence.
Katherine’s last blog post..Where the ark?
August 28th, 2008 at 12:02 pm, Amanda Says:
Bless A’s sweet heart. I’m so sorry for the loss. Definitely will be praying for all involved.
Amanda’s last blog post..Blame It On the Coffee?
August 28th, 2008 at 12:38 pm, Jeni Says:
I’ll be praying for you all.
Jeni’s last blog post..Alive!
August 28th, 2008 at 12:42 pm, Erin Says:
Your friends are in my prayers. No child should have to lose their father like that. Your friend is as blessed to have you now as you were to have her during your trials. When nothing you can do or say seems to help, just know that your love and your presence are enough to comfort her. I still treasure the people who were just there for me during difficult times.
Erin’s last blog post..DSC03892
August 28th, 2008 at 1:02 pm, noznbook Says:
Keeping you, A and her family in my prayers. You’re the best thing A can have right now: a friend to lean on.
August 28th, 2008 at 1:57 pm, Alice Says:
My deepest sympathies and best thoughts are with A, her family, and you all as her friends. Thank you for not only being there for her as her rock, but for using your talent with words to help raise up this support. I know that prayers from a stranger in Florida can’t be of much immediate help, but I know that your love and generosity are a great gift.
August 28th, 2008 at 2:03 pm, Alison Says:
I am so sorry. I can’t even imagine how horrible it must be to lose a husband and father so suddenly. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Alison’s last blog post..First Day
August 28th, 2008 at 2:32 pm, Marathon Mom Says:
You have always been a shining example of what true friendship means. I’m so glad we all have each other (our Girls Group). Love, MM
August 28th, 2008 at 3:02 pm, Cassie Says:
All of you are in my prayers. May your faith carry you all through.
August 28th, 2008 at 3:42 pm, Busy Mom Says:
Oh, man. I am so sorry.
(P.S. I wish we all had friends like you and A.)
Busy Mom’s last blog post..Easy come, easy go
August 28th, 2008 at 3:46 pm, Janie Says:
Oh, Anne, My heart aches for A and for you. This month had better end soon. I’m counting on September bringing happier times.
August 28th, 2008 at 4:07 pm, Joy East of theKingdom Says:
You got it!
Joy East of theKingdom’s last blog post..I See You in I.C.U.
August 28th, 2008 at 4:23 pm, Anna See Says:
I’ll pray for them, and for you. Your friend A is such an example of BEING THERE for a friend.
Anna See’s last blog post..Feeling Louse-y
August 28th, 2008 at 4:31 pm, alala Says:
Oh no, how very tragic. I’m so sorry for your loss, and A’s. Prayers from Germany headed your way.
alala’s last blog post..By: this and that « alala
August 28th, 2008 at 7:43 pm, KLee Says:
I’m so sorry to hear of her loss, and for yours. You are a truly good friend to help her out in her time of need, just as she was there for you during yours.
There’s nothing adequate you can say to someone on the loss of a spouse, but my heart goes out to her.
KLee’s last blog post..Tales Of Asshattery
August 28th, 2008 at 8:05 pm, Misty Says:
There is never anything adequate to say about the loss of a loved one. I understand how hard it is to find the type of friend A is and I am certain that she knows how much of a friend you are as well with out ever uttering a word. These types of relationships are made apparent in gestures not words. You, your family, A and hers will be in my thoughts and prayers. God Bless.
August 28th, 2008 at 10:12 pm, Andre Says:
You, A and her family are in my prayers.
Andre’s last blog post..Meet me in Chicago (with your laptop)
August 28th, 2008 at 10:17 pm, Lizzi Says:
How fortunate for both of you to have eachother. We’ll keep both your families in our prayers.
Lizzi’s last blog post..That’s just what you say when that happens
August 29th, 2008 at 11:46 am, Kaye Says:
Such an awful shock for her and her family. I will add them to my prayer list that is up via Mr. Linky at my faith-based blog.
Kaye’s last blog post..Special Project
August 29th, 2008 at 2:50 pm, In the Trenches of Mommyhood Says:
So very sorry to hear that. Your friendship sounds amazing.
In the Trenches of Mommyhood’s last blog post..Do You Kinoki?
August 29th, 2008 at 3:03 pm, E Bird Says:
So sorry for your loss- my thoughts are with you and A.
August 30th, 2008 at 10:11 pm, Jay Andrew Allen Says:
Best thoughts for your friend.
Jay Andrew Allen’s last blog post..Cindy McCain, Meet The Point. Point, Cindy McCain.
August 31st, 2008 at 2:01 am, baseballmom Says:
So, so sad…my thoughts are with you guys, and her family.
baseballmom’s last blog post..Camping love…
August 31st, 2008 at 5:31 pm, Heather, Queen of Shake-Shake Says:
I am so sorry for your friend’s loss. Many uplifting thoughts to them.
Heather, Queen of Shake-Shake’s last blog post..There Are No Hurricanes in Scotland, Right?
August 31st, 2008 at 9:07 pm, Jeanne Says:
Sending lots of love and prayers to A and her family. You are lucky to have each other and I know that you will do everything you can to support her in her time of need just as she did for you. I am so very sorry for the loss their family has suffered.
((((HUGS))))
Jeanne’s last blog post..School Begins!
August 31st, 2008 at 9:29 pm, Angus Mhor Says:
I am. I will.
Angus Mhor’s last blog post..Flashing In My Sleep
September 2nd, 2008 at 5:17 am, kathleen Says:
I think I know who your dear friend A is. I cannot imagine your anguish, and I pray for you all at this time. I saw the enormous outpouring at the church as I was out running last week. We prayed as we ran by. Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this most devastating time.